I was catfished in Korea! by a girl!

So I know usually catfishing is when a potential mate fakes an image in order to gain approval, acceptance, love and time from another person. Usually this is done in the hope that the person will fall in love with them and overlook the big lie. 

Well, I met a younger lady here who told me in the beginning that she suffered from a specific type of depression and had lost lots of friends from the condition. She also told me how she enjoyed catfishing many men. She would present herself as whatever type of woman they wanted, blonde, girlish, a little silly but caring. She would string them along for weeks even months. Then once they started pressuring her to meet up she would say that she decided to take a job out of the country and POOF be gone. 

I did give her my sincere thoughts on this type of behaviour.
Even though she seemed to understand my shock and dismay at her actions, she was heavily invested. 

So, then she proceeded to begin a friendship with me, gaslighting me that she wanted to be friends after we both leave Korea and basically showing me a funny, smart, ambitious young lady who was just trying to survive this phase of her life, like me. We talked almost every night and laughed about life abroad. It made things easier to have someone here to laugh with. 

Then POOF she was gone, after several weeks of communication. 
Now mind you, my definition of friendship is very strict. 
I know how flaky people are here so I do my best to guard myself. 
But I was still a little...hmmmnnnn....not sure how I felt. 


A part of me understands her deep depression. 
It can cripple you and make you focus only on the negative.

But the other side of me thinks that it is an easy way out to make sure that you only chew the sweet and juicy part of the gum. 
Once the gum becomes stale, you spit it out and chew a new, sweet piece. Keeping up walls protects you from having to feel real feelings. Catfishing allows for the fantasy but when reality is necessary, POOF Houdini disappears. 

I do wish the best for this young lady. 
We are all damaged by our life's experiences so I understand the need to hide and protect yourself. But to consistently do it at the expense of others is both cowardly and selfish. 

Catfishing anyone is wrong. Tell the truth and allow people to make a choice to stay or run away quickly.